Lydienne Albertoe
Emotions/Belonging/Mask (Abstract Faces) 2.0
Because of you I started to doubt me, my belonging and my identity.
Am I not good enough? Do I have to adapt? How much of myself do I have to lose to fit in?
Through your eyes I saw myself as the other. You made me doubt my identity. Your words had more effect on me than you thought beforehand.
It hurt that you couldn’t accept me without my masks. You made me wear the masks. Just to have a sense of belonging. You brought me down with your words.Why why why couldn’t you accept me without my masks?
I am like an infinite regression of identities/masks. Fits together like a set of Russian dolls.
Apparently the shortest way to myself is not through the other. Others made me doubt myself and insecure about my being and belonging.
I have to see my identity as a process, a process of time. My identity is not so much one of the essence, but one of the continuity of change. Changes that lead from one to another. Other what is the question now, to which others does it lead?
My belonging is a pure illusion. I am not my gender, my age, my skin color, my origin,
my country, my profession or the label you put on me. I am me.
I am I, misplaced and out of context.